Thursday, March 25, 2010

I felt so useless and such a letdown~


Miss me not ?
MIA for few days , not even msn
finally got the time to blog today
tests for this week has ended
and i'm free for the time being
msn is having a problem and i didn't manage to lock in
and it is crazily trying to log-in when i told it to stop
today 2 tests
average for both
but i'm afraid tt i won't score well for phy
last qns was simply a killer
i was stuck at tt qns for more than 15 mins
at tt the end i did it anyhow
chemistry was balancing equations
and i don't quite understand some of it
but i didn't bother to ask
just too tired and restless today
CE at the end of the day was quite alright
danced and sing
surprisingly our class sound not bad
but occasionally some toad croaking (no offence)
when to meet Miss.L with Fion
another off sch activity during 21 April
but it's only a one day thingy
so thanks god~

I don't understand why can u all be so out of control 
the moment i shouted at u all 
i regretted and i felt lyk crying but i didn't 
just lyk what JX say 
if u all don't do well 
we will feel that is we who didn't do our best to take charge of choir 
and we aren't good leaders 
but can't u all just keep quiet during the right times 
and cooperate with us 
it is the first time for WL and all to be conducting the choir 
don't u think tt u all should give then the basic respect that u all should 
i think tt u all are just plain selfish to just think of urselves 
thy/we are all trying very hard to help the choir 
why can't u all just do ur part by keeping quiet 
how difficult is tt to just keep ur mouths close

I actually also blame myself for not doing my part as a D-VP 
tt was the reason why i broke down during the meeting after tt 
i tried to hold my tears back but when i hear what LH says to me 
i just couldn't control 
and understand and realised how diffcult was it for them to be taking charge of choir last time 
i seriously didn't do my part 
i don't know why i didn't scold them tt day 
i just tolerate once and again 
but keeping quiet seriously cannot solve problems 
but i don't really believe in scolding 
as u all would be more defiant 
and tt not the result i want 
how what do u all seriously want us to do 
不吃软也不吃硬
i don't lyk scolding ppl 
tt why i only shouted once tt day 

and to u 
i'm seriously disappointed with u 
i'm not going to say any further 
or i will hear from others abt u to me 
just one think 
i disagree with ur view
and i think this seriously shouldn't be the way 
and please check properly before jumping into conclusion 
thank you!


ByeBye
Clarissa欣
Time check:5.28PM

我已渐渐迷失自己
我真的很讨厌我现在的现状
我不知该怎么办
我觉得自己好没用哦!
 可是我也不懂怎么去改变
怎么办
我好混乱,好混乱

我告诉自己要坚强
不要再在别人面前表现自己脆弱的一面
可是我就是控制不住
就为了保护自己
我越变越安静
而且也不知
从何开始我越来越伪装自己
不是我没有留意是我不敢承认
怎么办呢?





Clarissa★












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